Things Every Human Dating a Vampire Should Know

Aw, love. Isn't it a wondrous, magical thing? Well, if you happen to be in love, then it is. If you aren't then it's bloody annoying stupid twitterpation. But it's never easy, no matter who you are. And it's especially difficult if your heart happens to belong to one of us undead bloodsuckers. There are certain things a human dating a vampire must watch out for and several things which making being in a relationship with a vampire a bit annoying at times (according to the humans I've spoken with):

1. Do they love you for you, or your blood? Okay, granted, a vampire is always going to love your blood. If they didn't, then they'd want nothing to do with you. But a vampire who cares nothing about your looks, personality, talents, etc, who disregards all of those for the smell and taste of your blood? Not a keeper.

2. Meeting the parents. Sure, nowadays with the rise of supernatural teen romance, vampire/human relationships are far more accepted, but that still doesn't mean your parents won't be at least a little concerned when they find out your beloved Vladimir is two hundred years older than you and drinks blood. On the flip side, imagine going to your vampire love's place to meet her parents. Yeah, and you thought meeting human parents was nerve-wracking.

3. Vampire hunters. I recently had a bit of an incident with one, and it took months for me to go back to my regular life and routine. Now you may think that, as a human, you're safe from hunters, but once you're involved (especially romantically involved) with a fang, the hunters will be all over you like a fledgling on a freshly butchered carcass (hunters have a tendency to kidnap the human in the relationship in order to set a trap for the vamp. I really do dislike hunters...)

4. The lifestyle change. And no, I'm not talking about being turned into a vampire, I'm talking about adopting the vampire lifestyle. Being nocturnal, mostly, but also things like wearing sunglasses under fluorescent lights and cooking your steak rare. If you spend time with a vampire then trust me, you'll have to make a few adjustments.

5. The danger, the danger is a given. I for one think that it's obvious, but I feel I must list it. Your beloved fang might accidentally slip and sink his fangs into your throat, or crush your body whilst giving you a hug (we don't always know our own strength, you see). Vampire hunters can also fall into the category of danger, as well as run-ins with other, less friendly vamps, werewolves, and, well... it's just dangerous. So be careful, dear mortals.

Well, that's all for now. Coming soon, a handy guide for vampires on how to deal with dating humans! Until then, I bid you a fond farewell.