The Trials of being a "Halfling"

Two things before I get into the subject of this days post: first of all, your fledgling fang blog mistress is currently looking for a job. Which means I'm going to be putting a lot less effort into terrorizing the villagers and more into handing out resumes. Anyone know of any places that will hire a bloodsucking monster? Second of all, the lovely Miss from this blog is writing a novel with a character based on me! Oh, happy happy joy joy! I guess people actually do read my inane rambling nonsense!

Now, onto more important matters; that is, what I'm going to ramble about today. Why, half vampires, of course! Now if you've read one of my earlier posts, I stated that while two vampires can't have children, a human and a vampire can get together to have a human child. But where do half vampires fit in? Is there even such a thing?

When I first learned of the mating habits of vampires (doesn't that sound creepy?) and the whole 'mommy vampire + daddy human = baby human' thing, I assumed that there was no such thing as half vampires. That is, until just yesterday when I learned from Alora that half vampires do exists. And they're all around us.

It all has to do with genetics, basically. Recessive genes, homozygous traits and all that crap. Bascially, if two parents are carriers of a vampiric gene (because apparently that exists... Oh, the things you learn when hanging around the graveyard!) and they get together to make a baby, that baby will be what's known as a 'half vampire'. Now I have no idea why they're called 'half vampires'. Maybe it's easier than saying 'humans with a bit of vampire gene in them'?

As a further example, let's say that your great great great grandfather on your mother's side was a vampire. Over the years the vampiric nature was lost. Your mother is 100% human, but she still carries the vampire gene. Your father is the same; he's human, but he carries a vampire gene because someone, somewhere along the lines of his family was a vampire. Then your two carrier parents get together and have you. Their carrier genes get together and tada! You're a half vampire!

Typical signs of being a 'halfling' are:

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  Sensitivity to light. You probably burn extremely easily, you may have extreme photophobia, and all that.


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  "Night Owl-ism". You have a hard time sleeping at night. After all, daytime is the time for sleeping.


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  Super senses. Okay, so maybe your senses won't be exactly super, but you probably have better hearing than most people your age. The crappy beats and annoying voices of pop songs probably really get on your nerves, too.


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  An attraction to "spooky" things. There's a reason we vampires like coffins and black roses. Well, actually, there really isn't a reason. We just like them. And if you're the kind of human who reeeeally likes these things too well... you might just have a little vamp in you.

Now, say you are convinced that you are a half vampire. What should you do? Go drink blood? Jump off buildings in an attempt to fly? Um... no. Not at all. Because, remember, you're still human. Just because you've got some of the genes, doesn't mean you should be acting like a full vampire. That's pretty freaking dangerous don't you think? Just keep your head up high and hope that you'll one day meet your own prince of darkness who will turn you full-on fang.